Archive for May, 2010

Refusal

Sometimes we may never know in the mists of chaos that the richness of joy and happiness speaks loudly but not necessarily by just words.

My thinking moment without appeal

I have learned and have come to appreciate

That something’s in life are just going to be

The way it was designed or desired to be

In spite of one’s interest or desire

If we don’t learn how to fight and place into action

The aspects of survival and justification

To  insure that one grand chance to make wonderful and successful things happen

She’s passing through

I am in a strange place that I happened to pass through this evening

I am now hanging on a limb checking out the sites taking in everything

That I can hear, see or feel

I am cautious about what I do and say

Because I don’t know who could be watching or who might attack me

If I do the wrong thing

In return for this familiar feeling of self-confidence

That has presented its self to me again

I am willing to give it back by my gift of song

You see, I only sing to myself in my own space

Where no one can hear or see me

I rang out with beautiful harmony and a pinch of uncertainty

I was content with my gift of song

Out of nowhere I am asked to sing more, proudly and attentively

Then more figures appeared, all was quite and all eyes where on me

What tha?  Where did this sudden gesture come from?

To make me number one, put me on the spot and tell me

That I have no choice but to continue

I wasn’t ready for anyone to place me out of the box so to speak

I was doing just fine on my own, doing my own lil’ thing

I just wanted to jump into my middle dresser drawer and never come out

I sniffed real hard, wipe my over-sized eyes filled with tears and stared at everyone whispering to myself, I am twisted with all of you

I moaned and then I said that I WOULD TRY…

I sang, and I sang, but I wasn’t feeling this

I blurted out I can’t get this, I don’t feel it

Oh’ how I wanted to give up and leave

Just then a gentle one approached me and guided me on how to sing what I feel

Just Let it flow and sing it as if you’re speaking it, he told me

First try bombed, second try bombed, third and forth try I got it!

All right! give me 55555

I turned around and I saw some figures from the audience

That seemed not to like the idea that I was in control and able to hold my own

I am sorry if I have offended anyone

I just came into myself at that moment and I just have to be me

I had to be me and off I go disappearing like a slow rain tapering off from a storm

Leaving with the illusion that I am beautiful, confident, talented and blessed

With the grand gift of song

I can rock the house when I wanna and strike up a few drums

That was a great moment in time

I am thankful for my moment

Small Reflections

I’m back into the light of things

I had fallen short for reasons of my own

I had allowed others to stir up my path in ways not of my own

Time has always slipped away from me

Sometimes we have to let things happen

In order to be able to identify and redirect our purposes

But I am back with reason and now I am pushing forward…

Peak Show

Peak Show

We all as women fell good when we can do something for ourselves every once in a while

I went to my favorite lingerie shop and purchased some new silk panties

The colors where in various colors and shapes

I had slimmed down some, so I wanted to treat myself

I wore a pair of my new panties to an event

And had to excuse myself to go to the powder room

The powder room was filled with a variety of beautiful women

And all of the stalls were occupied

It was all right though because I was feeling fresh and free

My turn came up next

I went in, did my thing, and stood up to pull up my panties

To my surprise my panties rolled right down my legs to the floor

I wanted to crank up on a ladder to the blue skies and open my head up

And scream “why me” (from the embarrassment!)

My first thought was to pull them up and run out of the bathroom

Like the strike of a hot match

But then I decided to generously pull up my panties

And have a seat on the toilet and take a moment

I wondered if anyone saw my peak show

Hopefully they all were to busy chatting to notice

I then tiptoed out of the stall

Freshened up and left the powder room

I noticed ladies standing around

But then I pretended that the same thing had happened to all of them

And as I left I started laughing so hard the gum I had in my mouth

Jumped right out of my mouth, what a moment!

Olivia, Happy Mother’s Day to You…

Olivia, I would like to thank you, my mother for everything. My mother was strong-willed, witty and she had a pretty singing voice, “to me she was the smartest woman that I had ever known”. She was also loving, faithful, nurturing and she genuinely cared about folks. Family and her children meant everything to her.

She taught me to be proud of whom I am and to use what you had been given and use it to the best of your abilities. Also remember to be kind to others and always find away to put the Lord first.

Her constant absence reminds me every day of just how much I truly miss her. Without a doubt I do know that she is now in a better place. You see she has the time, place, the feel, the love and the understanding without restraints to freely proceed living out phase 2 of her better days in peace and I understand that 100%.

I continue to dance and sing  for you. Your daughter, Marie